Brave about the right things

Last time we said none of the four works alone. This time, courage, and the two things it needs most.

Courage is the one that gets all the attention. It looks good. But on its own it is the easiest of the four to point in the wrong direction.

Put it with wisdom and something changes. Courage plus wisdom is being brave about the things that are actually worth being brave about. Not chasing the adrenaline. Not putting yourself in harm’s way to prove a point. The trick is being brave about the right things, not just being brave. An adrenaline junkie is not always being courageous. He has potentially just found a loud way to avoid the quiet stuff that is harder to face.

So the first question is a simple one. What are you actually brave for? And is it the thing that matters, or the thing that is easiest to be seen being brave about?

Now put courage with kindness, and it points outward. Kind and courageous is going first. It is saying the awkward thing in the room so someone else does not have to. It is showing a person the way by walking it ahead of them. Kindness on its own can sit quietly and wait. Add courage and it moves. It goes first.

Notice that both pairings aim the courage somewhere. One aims it at what is worth it. The other aims it at other people. Left on its own, courage just looks for the nearest cliff.

One thing to try this week. Think of something you have been telling yourself you are “being brave” about. Ask whether you are brave for the right reason, or just brave where it is easiest to be seen. And if there is a smaller, quieter, more useful place to go first for someone else, go there instead.